Just for Laugh xD

Top 11 Samy Vellu Jokes


Don't know him? Okay. Maybe korang muda lagi kot. Ni la dia Sammy Vellu.

Ni serba sedikit pasal dia ;

Dato' Seri Samy Vellu Sangalimuthu (Tamil: சாமிவேலு சங்கிலிமுத்து) (born 8 March 1936) is an Indian Malaysian politician. He is the longest serving President of the Malaysian Indian Congress (MIC), a component party of the Barisan Nasional coalition, holding the position since 1979, for 11 consecutive terms. He was the Works Minister of Malaysia and the longest serving minister in the Cabinet of Malaysia until he lost his parliamentary seat in the 2008 general elections. He has since announced his intended retirement in December 2010 even though his contract ends in January 2011 paving way to his present deputy Dato' G. Palanivel to succeed.

Copied from Wikipedia

And these are his top 11 jokes..




1. Samy Vellu quoted on Pos Laju:
"Besok kirim, hari ini juga sampai"


2. On one TV news when he tried to say he felt very ashamed:
"Ini perkara sangat memalukan saya dan kemaluan saya sangat-sangat la besar"


3. Samy said in one of his “ceramah”:
"Kita akan bina satu jambatan wuntuk worang2 kampong di sini." Then one pakcik asked, "Datuk, sini takde sungai, buat apa bina jambatan?" And Samy gloriously replied, "Kalao takde sungai, kita bina sungai"


4. Samy's most favourite quote on the news for the decade is this:
"Toll naik sikit, banyak marah saya. You worang ingat semua ini toll saya punyer bapah punya kah!”


5. During water crisis:
"Semua worang diminta jangan membuang aiyerr!"


6. On social society's problem:
"Worang2 muda sekarang banyak suka hisap dade"


7. During blood donation's program at Sungai Siput:
"Marilah kita semua menderma dare"


8. His welcome speech in most of his functions:
"Selamat datang saudara-mara semua" (It should have been “saudara-saudari”)


9. During the height of the Al-Arqam's saga, he said in a press conference:
"Saya gumbira bahawa didapati tiada pemuda MIC terlibat dalam kes Arqam"


10. At an opening ceremony for a new building:
"Mempersilakan Datin Paduka Rafidah Aziz naik dari pentas wuntuk membuka kain"



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And of course the world's most joke of all time:

"Kita akan bina roket pigi matahari." One of the reporter responded, "Tapi Datuk, matahari terlalu panas untuk didekati." Samy replied, "Itu tade masalah. Kita hantar waktu malam"


credit to IMBA blog

p/s : I just copied from other sites. Don't know wether true or not. Anyway, just for fun :)